Saturday, February 4, 2012

Looking Back At Myself

I like my lines.  Those etchings in my visage. Those ephemeral furrows of a life lived.  Of laughs had.  Of laughs made.  I'm proud of those little reminders of years ticked off.  Of experiences had.  Of battles won.  The older I am, the more I've survived.  Battle scars of wind and time.

I don't feel old.  Don't think old.  I feel as young as I ever did.  Just grumpier.  Just more placid.  More satisfied.  More unsatisfied with waiting for life to happen.  Go and live it.  The secrets of life seem less secretive now.  What is important so much more tangible.  Friends get divorced now.  Friends die now.

Each new stage of life comes more quickly now.  Races up to you and is gone again.  Before you saw it.  Before you knew it.  How did we get here?  How long ago?  Familiar refrains now.  Black and white long gone.  Absolutes vaporized into reality.  Seeing the depth beneath the water.  Like a graph turned 3-D.

Seeing the world more simply.  Beyond the politicking.  Beyond the superficiality of man made desire.  The rational reality of fact.  Simplicity at a higher level.  A Universe immune to us.  A world that outlives us.  Every one of us.  Being born to die. The understanding of which lets us live more fully.

Gaze into that glass.  Revel in the evidence of time.  Immemorial.  In memoriam.  Age is a gift denied so many.  Too many.  Live your life vicariously through yourself.  Be a living monument to the passed.  To the past.  But most of all -- relax.


Sonja Jade said...

"Each new stage of life comes more quickly now. Races up to you and is gone again. Before you saw it. Before you knew it."

This is so true. I once had a good friend tell me that afte high school time blinks past you and you look up wondering where the hell the last fifteen years went, when it only feels like a few years have gone by. Deadlines seem shorter, little things seem more precious than ever before...

"And then one day you find, ten years have got behind you. No one told you when to run; you missed the starting gun." 'Time' by Pink Floyd

Amy said...

One day you stop and relize the dreams you once had have now changed. Things that were important to you then are not the same things you care for now. What the future brings no one can say. So enjoy the little things in life. Listen to the bird's singing. Watch the sunset. Take a moment to look at the world around you and smile.

Lara said...

You are awesome :) Just what I needed to read today!!

Anonymous said...

Richard, I am Diona & my daughter Genna & I r both GREAT Black Stallion Fans!! U R without a doubt the best actor I have ever had the pleasure of watching!! I have fallen in love with the Black through your series & the books & can't imagine how empty my life would b without u or the Black or Henry in it!! THANK U ALL!!